Post by Lasagna and tears of failure on Jan 19, 2023 17:28:47 GMT -8
Garfield Lasagnapaloza prognosticating 2053 Draft lotto. Not only do you get who gets drafted, you get the actual DRAFT order. No need waiting for Spence to tell you.
Now remember there are a couple* hot takes in here
1.Kings
Artis Gilmore C 7'2'' 240 22 B C- C- B+ A- A
Elite inside scoring, blocks and strength. Good handles, post defense and rebounding.
Kings get the number 1 pick and go with the obvious pick. +25 and this guy is a monstor for years to come. Everyone wants Artis in this draft
2. 6ers
Julius Erving SF 6'7'' 210 21 A- B- C+ C+ C+ A
Elite inside scoring, quickness and jumping. Good jumpshot and handles. Solid stocks and rebounding.
Ironically one of the greatest players of all time gets 2nd seat in the draft as FBB just cant accurately emulate players like DrJ. Good pick, just not the auto 1 that he should be. Hoping that one day he will be better than Buzz but think for that to happen he’ll need the million post pot boost.
3. Lakers
Elmore Smith C 7'0'' 250 22 B D+ C- A- B B
Elite inside scoring, blocks and strength. Good post defense and handles. Solid reblounding.
Only B potential, but a win today guy. These notes he could be a #1 pick in some drafts. Only thing holding him back is the scouted potential. Lakers are gonna love him for either coming out of the rebuild or getting a bounty to pass him onto a team looking to compete.
4. Magic
Steve Hawes PF 6'9'' 220 21 B C- C- B+ C+ A
Good inside scoring, steals, post defense and strength. Solid jumpshot and handles.
Magic are taking a chance that Steve will eventually be better than goo with his potential. Steve can go either way here, depending on his camps, either a SF or a PF, alas he will never be elite.
5. Blazers
Goo Kennedy PF 6'5'' 205 22 B C C B C+ B
Elite jumpshot. Good inside scoring, handles, quickness and post defense.
Goo and Howard are the same risk reward, so either can go here. Howard is the slightly better pick, but Rex trusts his gut and goes with Goo, cause he feels like Spence is gonna reward anyone choosing Goo.
6. Nuggets
Howard Porter PF 6'8'' 220 23 B+ C C- B C+ B
Elite inside scoring. Good jumpshot, handles and strength.
Royal gets the better player by notes, but really wishes he got Goo cause it’s obvious Spence is gonna hide Pot under a gooey mess. Howard though with a fresh +25 is gonna step right onto the stage and be a starter and woth his first max.
7. Cavs
Sidney Wicks PF 6'8'' 225 22 B C C- C+ C+ A
Good inside scoring and jumpshot. Solid handles, post defense, quickness and strength
Steve is upset that players haven’t fallen for him to steal, so he goes with a probably high pot pick that has nice notes. In a couple seasons Sid “John” Wicks will be killin people on the court.
8. Pistons
Charles Johnson PG 6'0'' 170 22 C+ C B B C B
Elite jumpshot, handles and quickness.
First PG taken is gonna be a day 1 impact player and with the right camps is gonna be better than last seasons rookie phenome Calvin Murphy.
9. Wizzards
Mike Newlin SG 6'4'' 200 22 C+ B+ B- C+ C- B
Elite jumpshot. Good quickness. Solid inside scoring, 3 point shot and handles.
Eddie is a little sad as he has been trying to trade up all draft, but end of day isn’t going to be upset getting Mike as a BU 1-3 to push the team into the playoffs. With his haul from the Dino trade, it’s surprising he even made the lotto.
10. Suns
Larry Steele SG 6'5'' 180 22 C+ B C A- C B
Elite jumpshot, handles and steals. Good quickness. Solid post defense and perimeter defense.
Larry sounds too good to be true, but sadly the suns will find while he shoots .550 from the field, he only attempts 3 shots a game. Good think he knows how to play D. Destined to be a mediocre BU 1-3, the Suns had to give him a shot.
11. Spurs
Dave Wohl PG 6'2'' 185 22 C C+ B- B C B
Elite jumpshot, handles and quickness.
Ashes woke up with not enough sleep, thinking he was back in Japan, and someone said David Grohl was gonna be in concert. While sleep deprived he was mesmerized by Dave “Grohl” Wohl and he got a pretty good PG. Dave will be a decent starter, putting up 18-22 ppg a night on very efficient shooting.
12. Hawks
Odis Allison SF 6'6'' 195 22 B- C+ B- C+ B- B
Elite handling and quickness. Good inside scoring. Solid jumpshot, post defense and rebounding.
Uncle DB takes a runner on Odis, noticing he might be a PF in SF clothing. OR maybe destined to play SG. The notes just screamed “take a chance on me” and so DB did.
13. Warriors
Randy Denton C 6'10'' 240 22 B- C- C- B B- B
Good post defense. Solid inside scoring, jumpshot, handles, quickness and rebounding.
After turning down 3 1sts from the Mavs for Bill the Warriors win just enough to not reset. Had they taken the 1sts, they would have got Calvin and Don Adams, +1 more. As it is their pick… is actually owned by someone else, so they don’t actually pick Randy…
But if they were picking, Stool would have picked Randy at #13
Now remember there are a couple* hot takes in here
1.Kings
Artis Gilmore C 7'2'' 240 22 B C- C- B+ A- A
Elite inside scoring, blocks and strength. Good handles, post defense and rebounding.
Kings get the number 1 pick and go with the obvious pick. +25 and this guy is a monstor for years to come. Everyone wants Artis in this draft
2. 6ers
Julius Erving SF 6'7'' 210 21 A- B- C+ C+ C+ A
Elite inside scoring, quickness and jumping. Good jumpshot and handles. Solid stocks and rebounding.
Ironically one of the greatest players of all time gets 2nd seat in the draft as FBB just cant accurately emulate players like DrJ. Good pick, just not the auto 1 that he should be. Hoping that one day he will be better than Buzz but think for that to happen he’ll need the million post pot boost.
3. Lakers
Elmore Smith C 7'0'' 250 22 B D+ C- A- B B
Elite inside scoring, blocks and strength. Good post defense and handles. Solid reblounding.
Only B potential, but a win today guy. These notes he could be a #1 pick in some drafts. Only thing holding him back is the scouted potential. Lakers are gonna love him for either coming out of the rebuild or getting a bounty to pass him onto a team looking to compete.
4. Magic
Steve Hawes PF 6'9'' 220 21 B C- C- B+ C+ A
Good inside scoring, steals, post defense and strength. Solid jumpshot and handles.
Magic are taking a chance that Steve will eventually be better than goo with his potential. Steve can go either way here, depending on his camps, either a SF or a PF, alas he will never be elite.
5. Blazers
Goo Kennedy PF 6'5'' 205 22 B C C B C+ B
Elite jumpshot. Good inside scoring, handles, quickness and post defense.
Goo and Howard are the same risk reward, so either can go here. Howard is the slightly better pick, but Rex trusts his gut and goes with Goo, cause he feels like Spence is gonna reward anyone choosing Goo.
6. Nuggets
Howard Porter PF 6'8'' 220 23 B+ C C- B C+ B
Elite inside scoring. Good jumpshot, handles and strength.
Royal gets the better player by notes, but really wishes he got Goo cause it’s obvious Spence is gonna hide Pot under a gooey mess. Howard though with a fresh +25 is gonna step right onto the stage and be a starter and woth his first max.
7. Cavs
Sidney Wicks PF 6'8'' 225 22 B C C- C+ C+ A
Good inside scoring and jumpshot. Solid handles, post defense, quickness and strength
Steve is upset that players haven’t fallen for him to steal, so he goes with a probably high pot pick that has nice notes. In a couple seasons Sid “John” Wicks will be killin people on the court.
8. Pistons
Charles Johnson PG 6'0'' 170 22 C+ C B B C B
Elite jumpshot, handles and quickness.
First PG taken is gonna be a day 1 impact player and with the right camps is gonna be better than last seasons rookie phenome Calvin Murphy.
9. Wizzards
Mike Newlin SG 6'4'' 200 22 C+ B+ B- C+ C- B
Elite jumpshot. Good quickness. Solid inside scoring, 3 point shot and handles.
Eddie is a little sad as he has been trying to trade up all draft, but end of day isn’t going to be upset getting Mike as a BU 1-3 to push the team into the playoffs. With his haul from the Dino trade, it’s surprising he even made the lotto.
10. Suns
Larry Steele SG 6'5'' 180 22 C+ B C A- C B
Elite jumpshot, handles and steals. Good quickness. Solid post defense and perimeter defense.
Larry sounds too good to be true, but sadly the suns will find while he shoots .550 from the field, he only attempts 3 shots a game. Good think he knows how to play D. Destined to be a mediocre BU 1-3, the Suns had to give him a shot.
11. Spurs
Dave Wohl PG 6'2'' 185 22 C C+ B- B C B
Elite jumpshot, handles and quickness.
Ashes woke up with not enough sleep, thinking he was back in Japan, and someone said David Grohl was gonna be in concert. While sleep deprived he was mesmerized by Dave “Grohl” Wohl and he got a pretty good PG. Dave will be a decent starter, putting up 18-22 ppg a night on very efficient shooting.
12. Hawks
Odis Allison SF 6'6'' 195 22 B- C+ B- C+ B- B
Elite handling and quickness. Good inside scoring. Solid jumpshot, post defense and rebounding.
Uncle DB takes a runner on Odis, noticing he might be a PF in SF clothing. OR maybe destined to play SG. The notes just screamed “take a chance on me” and so DB did.
13. Warriors
Randy Denton C 6'10'' 240 22 B- C- C- B B- B
Good post defense. Solid inside scoring, jumpshot, handles, quickness and rebounding.
After turning down 3 1sts from the Mavs for Bill the Warriors win just enough to not reset. Had they taken the 1sts, they would have got Calvin and Don Adams, +1 more. As it is their pick… is actually owned by someone else, so they don’t actually pick Randy…
But if they were picking, Stool would have picked Randy at #13
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