Post by Skillz on Jun 19, 2020 14:01:04 GMT -8
What NBA Player Are You?
It’s 2020 and the NBA is almost back. Who is your essence?
Brian H – Robert Covington
Brian is an FBB newbie who came into the league with low expectations, just as Covington did as an UDFA. Brian may not win his trades or inspire a ton of confidence, but he’s analytically-inclined and finds comparative advantages to win in ways that Covington does as NBA’s premiere 3&D Player.
Kobe – Kyrie Irving
Kobe and Kyrie both say a lot of bullshit, but sometimes they may even make some sense. Both have managed to piss off pretty much everyone they know, but have normally won wherever they go.
Greeme - Kyle Lowry
Greeme, like Lowry, has his own style and a sense of stubbornness that just seems ingrained. But both are underrated stars who were big factors on championship teams.
Skillz – Draymond Green
Green sees the floor differently from others and is normally a few passes and steps ahead of other players. But he’s loud-mouthed, limited in other areas and can piss off teammates and opponents alike. Seems fair.
Break – JR Smith
Steve – Joel Embiid
Normally his mouth can get him into trouble, but Steve has toned down the antics and has started to put a solid team together. Joel has vowed not to talk trash this year. Plus, the Philly connection!
Jah – Jahlil Okafor
JAH = JAH! Jahlil Okafor would have been a superstar in the 90s, with an amazing post-up game and a knack for scoring inside. Jah is a smart guy with a good head on his shoulders, but his slow, conservative approach to trading may not work in the new era of BBS.
Styro – Tyson Chandler
Once a championship-quality player, Tyson now is a glorified cheerleader for the Rockets. Styro has a storied history of legitimate success, but is now just fighting to stay in the league.
Pig – Patrick Beverley
Like Beverley, Pig marches to the beat of his own drum and doesn’t really care what people think. Pig will win his own way, but he’ll have no problem winning even if It is on his own terms.
PlayInsane – Dwyane Wade
Once a legendary champion, Play/Insane are enjoying their own “Last Dance” – giving inconsistent effort and only turning it on when it counts. Even though this duo may not be in its prime anymore, we’ll still see a great move every once in a while.
Svedda – James Harden
An absolute savage and regular season superstar just has not proven to get it done in the playoffs.
Galo – Ricky Rubio
Everyone wants to play with Ricky – the ultimate team player, exquisite passer and excellent teammate. But a team run by Slick Rick might have a ceiling on their championship aspirations.
Sargo – Carmelo Anthony
A lot of good, some bad, and a tricky resume to litigate. Sargo has made a ton of A+ moves and occasionally throws in a stinker. This type of polarizing play brings to mind one of Sargo’s favorite players: Carmelo Anthony.
Chipper – Shaun Livingston
Chipper has had some rough luck to start, and will need the type of resilience that Shaun Livingston showed aftter his devastating knee injury to stick in the league.
Game – Boban Marjanovic
Game doesn’t get a ton of “run” (he doesn’t post a ton anymore), but when he does, we notice. Everyone likes Game, and much like Boban, he would do well in a leaguewide popularity contest.
Habes – Russell Westbrook
Like the effervescent Rockets star, Habes can vacillate between an amazing move and a terrible move at a moment’s notice. Even if you question what he’s doing in the moment, it almost always works out in the end because of his tenacious effort.
Royal – Ben Simmons
Just when you think Ben Simmons has it all, he will pull-up for a jumper and you realize why people have questions about him. Royal has really high-end upside, but seems to undermine his own potential with idiotic moves once per year.
Ashan – Ben McLemore
A former high-lottery pick with a lot of potential was counted out. But after almost getting played out of the league, he’s enjoying the best season of his career and is now tracking like a positive contributor and efficient player.
Jeb – Zach LaVine
A talented player with a lot of confidence, one gets the impression that Zach LaVine thinks he’s the best player in the NBA every time he steps on the floor. I imagine this is what Jeb feels like every time he offers a late 1st round pick for a superstar. It’s going to piss people off, but sometimes you need that confidence to pull off a great deal.
UkFanJohn – Karl-Anthony Towns
An extremely talented ‘fella who has otherworldly abilities, you always feel yourselves wanting a little bit more. I’m not sure why the Spurs just haven’t been a bit better.
JR – Kawhi Leonard
He’s played the game better than anyone else over the last two years and knows when to pick his spots. He sat out for an entire season and is now back at this thing like he never left at all.
Erbes – Jimmy Butler
He’s roundly criticized – some of it fair, some of it unfair – but if you actually look at his resume, it’s pretty damn good. 50+ wins each season. You can question the process, but the results speak for themselves.
Manas - Andrew Wiggins
Vacillates from showing so much promise and so much disappointment. Manas made two of the picks of the draft in Dirk Nowitzki and Chauncey Billups and then punted a potential dynastic core. But now Gerald Wallace looks like a star in his own right. Every time you count the kid out, he brings you back in.
Frangie – RJ Barrett
This bright young mind is brimming with talent and a good deal of confidence, but he gives off the impression of being a bit green. I suspect him to struggle out of the gates but he’ll eventually be able to find his footing.
Nanz – Dame Lilliard
He hasn’t won a title yet, but he always quarterbacks good teams and seems to be respected and liked by all. This is the leader you want!
Andrew – DeMar DeRozan
A really talented player with finesse and an old-school mentality, one wonders if there is a ceiling on a team built around DeMar. Andrew looks to be building a perennial 47-win squad. DeMar would be the most fitting centerpiece.
Dan – Jrue Holiday
He’s always involved in a lot of player movement, but always seems to do a good job on whatever team he is on. He may not have the superstar ability of some of his peers, but he does a damn good job.
Ashes – Chris Paul
A bull-dog and underrated player (seriously, Chris Paul is statistically the best PG of all-time), he is still looking for his playoff coronation. Until then, he may not enjoy the respect he deserves.
13-Rock – Mario Hezonja
He’ll occasionally throw a bullet-pass, once he even dunked on Giannis, but most of the time you are left wondering what the fuck he is doing.
